Screenplay Ideas: Part One

This new column will focus on awesome ideas I have for a B (or even C) list movie I will make in the future when I grow up to a be a movie directer or screenwriter.

Block 2 anatomy is making me desperate. I am trapped in a paradoxical situation, where I want to do well on the lab test but find when I go into lab to study, I get really tired and bored and just want to look at all the pretty people. As a result, a whole bunch of arteries and nerves look like a big ole tangled mess rather than the intricate, miraculous web (created by God) that keeps me alive.

One day, I got to thinking - what if the lab came to me at my house? I talked to Julia about stealing a cadaver and putting it in my garage so I could study it whenever without ever venturing into the -23 degree weather. This leads to my screenplay idea for a new horror film in the manner of Hostel or the rather old school Silence of the Lambs or even the Angelina Jolie vehicle, The Bone Collector.

What if there was a medical student who was such a gunner, who wanted to be the best anatomy student he or she could be, that this individual went to killer extremes to learn every branch and every known human variation of the subclavian artery? What if 50 professionally embalmed cadavers were not enough for said medical student? What if sharing one cadaver with three germy, snot-faced, whiny medical students was not an option for said individual?

What if this medical student became a serial killer so that he (or she, hey I'm equal opportunist) went on a killing spree and went home to study the murdered individual's body ad nauseum. Now, this is logistical because a medical student has all of the intellectual know-how on how to stab someone in the right places. They gloss these things over by calling them "clinical correlations," but I could just as easily file away this helpful doctor info as "How to be an awesome serial killer."

Back to the serial killer medical student though - although his actions would be tragic and morally reprehensible, I bet this kid would totally ace the practical. And that could be the final scene of the movie: serial killer medical student getting a big fat honors. It would be sort of like the end of Karate Kid where Ralph Macchio wins the big match and Mr. Miyagi looks on proudly, but a more twisted, cynical, David Lynchian-type end.

--By Mariam, an MS1 who also is a princess with a profound love of ponies.